CHOIR PRACTICE OVER WHATSAPP VIDEO CALL

Here comes the time ♫♬  when everything has to be done online or not done at all. So, my sister and I were discussing today. Today is Saturday and we were supposed to go for choir practice by 4, but as you know, there is no church so there is no practice. We were wondering what life would be like if we were actually still going to have the practice just over video call. Bear it in mind that this is Nigeria not everyone has data, the data connection will most likely be bad, African mothers will always have errands, the adults will not know how to video call or put the camera too close to the face and there may not be light to charge oh and don’t forget that as Nigerians, many will come up with excuses not yet known to man like I want to see if the cloud outside is blocking the connection or something equally as silly.
Moving on, if we were to have a virtual choir practice (not in my church though), I’m almost sure it will go like this:
Choir master created the group, “GLORIOUS VOICES”
Choir master added 64 participants
50 left
Choir master initiates the call
Only 4 pick
Choir master: I don’t know why only five of us will be here for practice. God is a patient God. Most of us have brought our online behaviour into God’s presence. We forget that God is everywhere including here
Sister Rita looks up
Choir master: Sister Rita, why are you looking up, is it not true that God is here? Are you sure you can see him? In fact Sister Rita pray for us.
(After the prayer)
Choir master: so as I was saying, we need to reverence God in all that we do. BLOOD OF JESUS!!!!
All participants: what happened sir?
Choir master: Sister Rita!! What are you wearing? And you know that men are here, Brother Kunle, please stop looking at her. Oh my God, Sister Rita, please cut the call and leave the group, we’ll discuss your punishment later.
(Sister Rita left the group)
Choir master: so Brother Kunle, please run us through the song.
Brother Kunle: (all participants see Sister Rita in the background) ehm Choir master, my battery is low, I have to charge.
(Brother Kunle cuts the call, sister Sola takes initiative)
Sister Sola: do reee fa l
(Sister sola disconnects)
Choir master: her network was really bad, maybe she will call back but let’s not forget that the Bible says “where two or three are gathered…” so we will move on, we will all sing together now from chorus to verse one. One, two three…go
(Song is scattered in different directions, the network is bad and some are confused, Choir master becomes angry)
Choir master: in fact, we don’t take the things of God well. Most of us will prefer to talk to ungodly men. In fact choir practice dismissed, (before he goes on, 08097868543 left) she didn’t even wait for me to finish, is this how to serve God? The rest of us, if we like let us listen to the song and practice, if not let us sing rubbish during Easter service, imagine out of 64 choir members, I had to load my phone for data, we need to take things seriously, some of us prefer to listen to worldly songs and…
(“Nobody” by dj Neptune plays and choir master picks the call)
“Hello, I’ll call later”
Comes back to the phone: (clears throat) God help us.

OR
CONFERENCE MEETING OVER VIDEO CALL
Possible problems
Some people will be wearing suit on top and boxers under (something I can do, in fact something I’ve done, people who viewed my status on my birthday can testify)

There will be noise from Africa magic Yoruba underneath
The network will most likely be good depending on the company
Finally, someone sneezes and everyone disconnects starting from the Chairman.

On a different note, I thought I was stocked up, yesterday, I took a walk and bought chips, chin chin apart from the ones my father got, even got groundnut, ice cream, etc thinking that in my mind I have stocked up. People of God, today has not ended and I have nothing left. Praise the Lord!!


This is just for laughs and is not a factual representation.

The updates are more regular now to make your self isolation fun. Hope you enjoyed it.

LOVE,
❤
OMO AYAN