CHOIR PRACTICE OVER WHATSAPP VIDEO CALL

Here comes the time ♫♬  when everything has to be done online or not done at all. So, my sister and I were discussing today. Today is Saturday and we were supposed to go for choir practice by 4, but as you know, there is no church so there is no practice. We were wondering what life would be like if we were actually still going to have the practice just over video call. Bear it in mind that this is Nigeria not everyone has data, the data connection will most likely be bad, African mothers will always have errands, the adults will not know how to video call or put the camera too close to the face and there may not be light to charge oh and don’t forget that as Nigerians, many will come up with excuses not yet known to man like I want to see if the cloud outside is blocking the connection or something equally as silly.
Moving on, if we were to have a virtual choir practice (not in my church though), I’m almost sure it will go like this:
Choir master created the group, “GLORIOUS VOICES”
Choir master added 64 participants
50 left
Choir master initiates the call
Only 4 pick
Choir master: I don’t know why only five of us will be here for practice. God is a patient God. Most of us have brought our online behaviour into God’s presence. We forget that God is everywhere including here
Sister Rita looks up
Choir master: Sister Rita, why are you looking up, is it not true that God is here? Are you sure you can see him? In fact Sister Rita pray for us.
(After the prayer)
Choir master: so as I was saying, we need to reverence God in all that we do. BLOOD OF JESUS!!!!
All participants: what happened sir?
Choir master: Sister Rita!! What are you wearing? And you know that men are here, Brother Kunle, please stop looking at her. Oh my God, Sister Rita, please cut the call and leave the group, we’ll discuss your punishment later.
(Sister Rita left the group)
Choir master: so Brother Kunle, please run us through the song.
Brother Kunle: (all participants see Sister Rita in the background) ehm Choir master, my battery is low, I have to charge.
(Brother Kunle cuts the call, sister Sola takes initiative)
Sister Sola: do reee fa l
(Sister sola disconnects)
Choir master: her network was really bad, maybe she will call back but let’s not forget that the Bible says “where two or three are gathered…” so we will move on, we will all sing together now from chorus to verse one. One, two three…go
(Song is scattered in different directions, the network is bad and some are confused, Choir master becomes angry)
Choir master: in fact, we don’t take the things of God well. Most of us will prefer to talk to ungodly men. In fact choir practice dismissed, (before he goes on, 08097868543 left) she didn’t even wait for me to finish, is this how to serve God? The rest of us, if we like let us listen to the song and practice, if not let us sing rubbish during Easter service, imagine out of 64 choir members, I had to load my phone for data, we need to take things seriously, some of us prefer to listen to worldly songs and…
(“Nobody” by dj Neptune plays and choir master picks the call)
“Hello, I’ll call later”
Comes back to the phone: (clears throat) God help us.

OR
CONFERENCE MEETING OVER VIDEO CALL
Possible problems
Some people will be wearing suit on top and boxers under (something I can do, in fact something I’ve done, people who viewed my status on my birthday can testify)

There will be noise from Africa magic Yoruba underneath
The network will most likely be good depending on the company
Finally, someone sneezes and everyone disconnects starting from the Chairman.

On a different note, I thought I was stocked up, yesterday, I took a walk and bought chips, chin chin apart from the ones my father got, even got groundnut, ice cream, etc thinking that in my mind I have stocked up. People of God, today has not ended and I have nothing left. Praise the Lord!!


This is just for laughs and is not a factual representation.

The updates are more regular now to make your self isolation fun. Hope you enjoyed it.

LOVE,
❤
OMO AYAN

TEN MISTAKES YOU MAKE WHEN BRUSHING

In this time of self isolation, we’re going back to the basics.

If you think you’ve been brushing right, then get ready to be shocked.

1. Brushing less than 2 minutes:

never be in a hurry, 2 minutes is the recommended time by dentists to brush your teeth.

2. Rinsing your mouth with water after brushing: it reduces the efficacy of the fluoride but habits die hard don’t they? So make conscious effort from henceforth. You can use a mouthwash instead.

3.Using your brush for too long: aunty, uncle, after three months, please change your brush, if not the bristles won’t brush your teeth well. This also extends to having the wrong toothbrush, when it comes to brushing, the softer, the better.

4  Not cleaning your tongue: when you brush your tongue, it helps to get rid of bad breath.

5. Brushing hard and in up-to-down motion: it’s better to brush in circles and softly.

6. Random brushing: brushing is an art not a chore so please try to maintain a rough 45° angle, your  if you buy a good brush, I’m sure you would notice it is slightly bent, it helps with discolouration.

6. Switch things up a bit. Change your brushing style once in a while. Start from an unfamiliar spot and you just may be surprised by the result.

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8. Brushing right after eating may damage enamel especially after foods containing citric acid which softens the enamel.

9. Sharing toothbrushes: this facilitates sharing bacteria from mouth to mouth.

10.Storing brush in the bathroom might not be the best idea, germs may settle on the bristles, so try storing it elsewhere.

This list has been compiled from various articles just for your dental care. Hope you enjoyed it.
After this, get ready to smile with confidence when the lockdown is eased.

(C) Google Images

Thank you so much for reading.
Love,
❤

OMO AYAN

WHAT DOES YOUR BRUSHING TECHNIQUE SAY ABOUT YOU?

If you’ve ever shared accommodation with anyone, you would agree with me that we all have our ways of brushing and that it sometimes reflects our behaviour. Let’s catch some cruise👿👿


MMA FIGHTERS

CHARACTERISTICS: Funny to watch but not quite when you’re close to these kind of people. They tend to assume all poses. Sometimes you ask yourself, are they brushing or practicing for next year’s Olympics?
CHARACTER: tendency to be violent in their sleep, may also have several altercations with people, believe in brute force.

OYOWMA

DOCTOR’S NOTES: We cannot emphasise this enough, it is not by power or might, buy good brush not smoker's brush and please note that it is your mouth, please treat with care. I just don’t get it, must you brush till you bleed I mean, what’s up with that?
CHARACTERISTICS: applies force and strategy. Also, position is important to these set of people, they must stay where the sink is not chipped, may also use chewing sticks every once in a while. They may also like to stay near the mirrors and use colourful cups. Most importantly, they set up and if you don’t understand this, please imagine a makeup artiste opening up her box to start owanbe make up.
CHARACTER: may be hypocritical, tend towards believing in face lift or a sense of false cleanliness. I’m talking about the people who ‘sweep’ but keep some junk under their beds.


CCC (COOL, CALM AND COLLECTED)

SIDE NOTES: These are rare as gems, you almost never see them. They are like the Hollywood stars we see on TV. Truth be told, most Nigerians tend to add a little more effort just to be sure. Better safe than sorry.
CHARACTERISTICS: they use the recommended types of brush, change it every three months, may or may not visit the dentist but try to practice good dental care regardless, also brush the right way. They may also get sensitive about where the paste is pressed from.
CHARACTER: tends to plan ahead, may also be a perfectionist or a little rigid, may or may not be a serial killer.

SPIT GENG

I’m not sure how to introduce these people but we have to, don’t we?
CHARACTERISTICS: makes you wonder whether you brush your own teeth too. They are quite sloppy and also take their time when brushing. Also they tend to get lost in thought while performing this act.
CHARACTER: tends to fall victim to peer pressure, might also be quite slow in performing day-to-day tasks, and also tends to overlook things

ACCURATE TIME WASTERS

CHARACTERISTICS: These set of people do not actually take the time to brush but take time in doing other things. They spend this time talking to friends, playing music (they even sing along) or engaging in some form of social activity or the other.
CHARACTER: happy-go-lucky, quite hard to pin down, very social animals

DISCLAIMER: please note that this is for laughs and is not intended to be taken seriously. Thanks.


So which are you? To know this, answer these questions...
How long does it take for you to brush your teeth?
Is your brush an international brand name and how old is your brush?
Do you have a special place where you keep your toothpaste and brush?
Of the categories, which do you identify with?
Not that it matter, but do you press your paste in the middles, at the bottom or use a dispenser?

Please try to answer YES/NO as applicable.

(C) Google Images


Please try to stay indoors and in all, stay safe.
LOVE,
❤
OMO AYAN