THE RIPPLE EFFECT

Welcome to my world, where fines are flying, ranging from 2k to 5k. In fact, these people don’t seem to know this is the Buhari era when they slam you with 5k fine. Your wall is dirty-5k, rain water on your balcony-5k(did I send the rain?), one idiot from another block shits near your floor-5k per person, your stubborn roommate is cooking-5k, your friend comes to visit and leaves the door open-5k, okay maybe not like that but anything now is 5k even washing anywhere. Imagine if you’re now the cause of four other people’s 5k and the onus is on you, in short 25k haff knack, edakun in this economy that’s everlasting debt. Begging for alms can’t get you that kind of money even your parents will ignore you for such outrageous request. So my roommates and I came up with a solution we called ‘the ripple effect’.  Officially some of us have no net worth so imagine one unknown idiot commits a crime that gets you fined, while trying to get the money another roommate gets you fined, you’re almost suicidal and then you get your self fined. Here’s what you do, you start prostitution and since you’re an amateur and your body is not gold, your market price has not increased. You can’t really earn much considering there’s competition, girls who would offer the same services if not better for less, so you’re unlucky the first customer uses up all your bodily fluids in the ‘rigorous exercise’, you use your earning to buy blood tonic and pain relievers but at least you’re thankful you’ve not become Benz. Then you keep going all through the week and by the time you count your earnings you’re still 10k short of the 25k. So you lie to your parents about a textbook of 5k but you’re unlucky and there’s actually a very important textbook of 2k and that’s not counting day-to-day upkeep so after buying that you still need 7k. the next step, you borrow from your ‘business associates’ if you know what I mean and promise to pay the 7k back with 8k as per incentive after next week’s work. infact you try to upgrade your 'business' too and from there, because of one hostel somewhere, the path of your life has changed. It is now a prayer point not to get fined cause your life can spiral from there, you may even snatch your warden’s husband from there or get pregnant for her son, the ripple effect that started with the 5k movement.

While this article does not proffer prostitution as a legal or moral alternative to problems, it also goes to say not all laws can be followed and while we try our best, the spirit of the law should be followed rather than the letter of the law and we should never lose our humanity. There’s no money out there and we simply can’t afford all these so gently o!

With love from me to you especially the people who never miss any update. I love you.
LOVE,
OMO AYAN
❤